So Jay left almost a month ago and oh my God has this been hard. Him being gone is without a doubt one of the hardest things that I have had to deal with. Here I am though, almost a month later and still functioning on a daily basis, make up on and legs shaved (well ok they aren’t shaved EVERY day but come on). We are finally getting into a routine when it comes to talking to each other and that makes things a little bit easier. Thank God for Skype and Meebo. My phone is ALWAYS by my side, I jump whenever it rings, and then get pissed at whoever called because they got me all excited. My new hobby consists of buying things to send to Jay, packing it perfectly inside the teeny tiny so called “LARGE “ flat rate box and taking pride in the fact that a grain of rice couldn’t find a spot to hitch a ride to Iraq even if it wanted to. I allow myself extra time at the post office for conversations with the mail people who are always most curious about what is in this week’s package and if he received the one from last week. The lady always ensures my customs forms are perfect and that I don’t list items like tobacco that cause delay so that he receives everything quickly. The guy at the Post Office always asks about Jay first and my Pit Bulls second since he just so happens to be a Pit lover and rescuer himself. Such sweet people! They even help me stuff and tape boxes when I’ve tried to put in way more than what would naturally fit. Yeah, you try fitting a queen sized pillow in a “large” flat rate box. It is crazy how supportive people that you don’t even know can be. The best story so far is the Lady at Target…..
I was shopping for some last minute things to put in Jay’s box and I was wearing the shirt that he got me that says “My Soldiers Got Your Back”. A sweet lady who was working at Target stopped me and said “ I love your shirt, my son just joined the Army and I’m so scared for him. How do you do it? Where is your soldier?“. All I said was “My soldier is in Iraq” and her eyes immediately filled up with tears and she gave me the biggest hug, which of course made me cry. There we stood two complete strangers hugging and crying in the middle of Target. It was an incredible moment. She had no idea who I was or who Jason was but she hurt for us and she was grateful for both of our sacrifice. Which that one still gets me, when people say “tell your soldier thank you”, It is by far the most proud that I have ever been of someone in my life, I love it and I appreciate it. The thing that really gets me though is when they tell me thank you for my sacrifice, as if I’ve done something. My sacrifice is not even large enough to be mentioned next to the sacrifices that he is making. I always say thank you politely but it always makes me feel selfish to acknowledge gratitude that I do not deserve.
So 134 more days until he is home (tentatively of course and I hate that damn word by the way). I miss him more and more each day and with missing him I love him more and more as well. I can’t wait for him to get home so that I can feel his arms around me, kiss his pretty lips and just watch him laugh and enjoy our life together. So please keep him in your prayers until he returns and in the meantime I’ll keep my make-up on and my legs shaved (for the most part) .
